Better Off On My Own
by BonesBird
Summary: They both give up trying to find that special person, but it plays on her mind, so he offers to give her the gift of a lifetime. But is that really why he agreed?  rating may change later in story
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Better Off On My Own  
****Summary: They both give up trying to find that special person, but it plays on her mind, so he offers to give her the gift of a lifetime. But is that really why he agreed?  
****Lyrics: Sum 41 - Pieces**

**This is just something that came to me while I was thinking about this song. I appear to be having some issues with getting emails from (I dunno about anyone else) so I'll reply to reviews if/when I get them. **

_**

* * *

I tried to be perfect  
**__**But nothing was worth it  
**__**I don't believe it makes me real**_

She looked over her shoulder and once again felt abandoned. There were 4 men in her life that she honestly could trust. Three of them were totally off limits, and one was her best friend. Every other man she let in always found a way to let her down. No matter how hard she tried, how much of herself she gave to the men she dated, they never found a reason to hang around.

So there was nothing left for her to do but officially give up on men. She was never going to end up with her perfect man. She wasn't even entirely sure a "perfect man" existed anymore. Surely she'd have found him before now. She didn't have long left before her dream of her own family was going to fall apart. But she couldn't just have a baby or a family with any man she knew.

Maybe she was better off alone. Maybe she was better off giving up on her fantasy. She had a good life, and great friends. She would always be the fairy godmother, she would always be the bridesmaid. Maybe she'd go down the stereotypical line and start buying a million cats. She knew there were other avenues. But once again she wasn't going to think too much.

She knew what the girls would say. _"it's just another date Penelope"_ but just another date became another, and another, and another, until there had been too many. Too many past chances squandered, too many thoughts left unfinished. So much left to chance. So much forgotten about in tears and ice-cream. Left in the back of her mind, another failed relationship.

There was always her one man. The one man who had never let her down, who loved her unconditionally. Who she could call at 3am and know that he'd be over in minutes. But he was never going to be that guy for her. They were best friends and he wasn't one for settling down and having kids. He never had been, and in the years she'd known him, he hadn't changed at all.

She had crushed on him, for years, and for a time she'd been sure he'd felt the same way, even now some days she thought he did. But it was by the by. You didn't go 6 years without acting if you wanted someone as more than just a one night. Or if you were sure you could make it. She wasn't sure that she could make a relationship work. If she couldn't make it work with relative strangers, how would she ever make anything work with someone she couldn't lose.

So as of that moment, she was single. But she wasn't looking. If she fell head over heels in love with someone she might change her mind. For now though, she was just going to work through her issues alone. She was better off that way anyway

_**I thought it be easy  
**__**But no-one believes me  
**__**I meant all the things that I said**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Titile: Better Off On My Own  
****Lyrics: Pieces - Sum 41**

**So, to continue this then? Yeah? **

**As soon as I get emails I will reply to all your amazing reviews, but I have read them all and I thank you so much for taking the time to review. I'm so glad you all like this story. You've convinced me to go back to my original plan… just so it's longer for you all…**

_**

* * *

This place is so empty  
**__**My thoughts are so tempting  
**__**I don't know how it got so bad**_

He looked around the big house again and couldn't help but feel alone. He had never really had a problem with being alone in the silence until the last few months. The time it had been since he thought it was time for him to grow up, settle down. Meet the girl of his dreams and have a million babies. Maybe not a million, but start his own family.

The first date he'd gone on had been a disaster, and so he hadn't bothered with any others. For almost four months he'd been at home alone. Thinking of what would make up his perfect woman. Not even her looks. But all the properties he wanted her to have. He wanted her to be the woman that he had loved for years.

She was pretty much unattainable though. He knew that but it meant that searching for someone to settle down with was nigh on impossible. Not to mention that dating around his odd schedule was, well, difficult to say the least. He could never confirm a date night until the day. There was little to point of him making plans with a girl.

He couldn't settle with anyone else, because they weren't her. Tonight she was out with some loser who didn't deserve her. But he sat quietly because even if he couldn't be happy, she deserved to be. He loved her enough to never think about himself. He always wanted to put her first. She wanted a family and he still wasn't sure he could give her that.

"Hey Baby Girl, I thought I'd call and see how it's going. So, er" he trailed off. Thinking how to end his message without sound like a loser. "yeah, call me, when you can." he clicked off and stared at the phone. Thinking about how stupid he could be. If he was so sure he couldn't have her why did he always jump for her. To tell her what she needed to know.

His heart jumped as his phone started playing her song. He had his own ringtone for her, a happy, light song he'd heard on the radio and thought of her. So he'd downloaded it and saved it for her. He stared at the phone, not sure why she was ringing him back so quickly. "Hey, baby, didn't expect a call back so quickly"

"It was a failure, Hot Stuff" she told him, and he regretted hearing the sadness in her voice. "He left me before we even finished desert" he hated that so many men couldn't see how amazing she was. They were the idiots, for not seeing her inner beauty, or her brains. "Can you come over? Please?" He smiled at her question, already pulling his clothes back on.

"I'll be there in 20 minutes" he told her. Maybe he could convince her that she should just go for it again.

_**Sometimes it's so crazy  
**__**That nothing can save me  
**__**But it's the only thing that I have**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Titile: Better Off On My Own  
****Lyrics: Pieces - Sum 41**

**So, hmmm… if I tell you this is nowhere near the end will you stop squeeing down my ear please? **

**Today my amazing fiance left for his last tour, and I'm already missing him like crazy and I can't wait for him to come home.**

_**

* * *

I tried to be perfect  
**__**It just wasn't worth it  
**__**Nothing could ever be so wrong**_

She had changed into her pyjama's while waiting for him to arrive, there was no point in her still being dressed up when there was nobody to impress. She already had her DVD's out on the table, a tub of ice-cream and a bottle of wine on the table by the time she heard Morgan's distinctive knock and the turning of her handle.

She tried to hide the tears she'd let fall, not because she thought he'd judge her for it. But because it meant that she was letting these guys get to her, and she knew he hated that. He didn't even need to ask her anything to know what she was doing. He just came over to her and wrapped his arms around her. Pulling her against him.

"Baby" he whispered into her hair, letting her cry before sitting back, pulling a beer out for himself and topping up her glass of wine. "He's obviously an idiot" he smiled as she took a gulp of the wine, "Whoa, slow down" he laughed and put his hand over her glass. "Penelope, look at me. If he couldn't see you, then he's the idiot."

"I'm the idiot Derek" she moved her glass and took another gulp of her wine. She felt his eyes on her, despite the fact she had put the TV on for him. She tried to avoid his gaze, but it wasn't long before is silent staring got to her. "I'm the one who keeps letting them get close when I know that it isn't what I want" she shrugged.

"What do you want" He asked, not dropping his gaze from her cheek. She refused to turn to him, not wanting to fully admit what she wanted, "you can tell me, anything baby girl" he smiled, and she finally turned toward him. She felt the tears welling up again as she thought about what she really wanted, and the fact that with all these failed dates.

"I want so much more than this Derek" she whispered to him. "I want a family, a relationship. I'm getting old. That won't be possible soon" she felt her tears fall again as he pulled her back towards him. Holding her tightly in his arms. She felt safe and protected there. Like everything else they did, they had, it was perfect. She wouldn't change this.

"One year" he replied, looking down on her, giving her an encouraging look

"One year, til what" she asked, not following his thoughts

"One of us finds someone. If we don't, lets give whatever we have a shot" he looked so excited, but she still wasn't entirely following his meaning

"What do you mean?"

"Penelope, I love you, I always have but you deserve to find someone better for you. If you find him in the next year I walk away"

"One year?"

"One year Baby Girl" he smiled again, and this time she returned it.

_**It's hard to believe me  
**__**It never gets easy  
**__**I guess I knew that all along**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Title: Better Off On My Own**  
**Summary: They both give up trying to find that special person, but it plays on her mind, so he offers to give her the gift of a lifetime. But is that really why he agreed?**  
**Lyrics: Sum 41 - Pieces**

**Haha of course I'm not gonna make it easy for myself. I never, ever do. Nath... Trust me, my love... FYI 666 words. Win!**

* * *

_**If you believe it's in my soul  
**__**I'd say all the words that I know**_

"Why?" she asked. Her mind still trying to process what he'd proposed to her. Was he really saying that she should try to find someone better for her than him. Yet still have the possibility of having in him in time. She didn't know how his mind could think that was a good idea.

"Just trust me. If we're both single in a year we'll try" He looked at her with a glint in his eye and she could see that he was excited.

"Why us?" not that she was questioning him. He had asked her to trust him.

"Because you're my best friend" he replied simply, flicking the TV channel and finally looking away from her as if the conversation was over. She allowed it to go quiet for a few minutes

"That matters because?" she prodded him, still not willing to let it drop

"I don't want to see someone I love give up their dream"

"But we couldn't just…" she trailed off as he turned to face her again, taking her hands in his he smiled

"Let's set a date, for today in one year, which can be cancelled if one of us meets someone" he looked so excited to be setting a date, the date, for them.

"We're setting a date, a year in advance" she laughed, before seeing his face fall slightly. She tangled her fingers around his and smiled, showing she was still open to his idea

"Yes we are, and in one year I am going to treat you how every woman should always be treated. I'm going to show you what it's worth, make you feel special" he squeezed her hand and slipped back against the sofa

"You make me feel special every day" she told him honestly, settling back against him as he flicked the movie they'd been watching back on

"Just concentrate for the next year, and if nothing comes of it, we've got a shot" he placed a kiss on the top of her head.

"Why a year" she asked in a sleepy voice a short while later, having started falling asleep against his chest, back in her usual place on a Friday night.

"It seems like a reasonable length of time" he answered with a gentle shrug, just enough to cause her to sit up a little

"So this, this is going ahead?" she asked, just wanting to make absolutely certain she wasn't dreaming

"Absolutely, and Garcia" he grinned at her as he stood up, walking towards the kitchen

"What?" She groaned, knowing what he was going to tell her

"This still means you need to try" he smiled and went to turn away again but her words caught him

"Derek, On one condition" he cocked an eyebrow at her, clearly not having expected her to have a comeback.

"What's that?"

"You try too"

_**Just to see if it would show  
**__**That I'm trying to let you know  
**__**That I'm better off on my own**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Lyrics: Come Around - Rhett Miller**

**It took me almost a week to pick a new song for this part of the story, but with the help of Pat, Kirsty, Dana, SJ and Ash I finally came up with this little beauty. Next 3 chapters use this song, I'm not really setting too much of a time frame yet. A date each, and another little chapter together.**

**Sorry about not updating yesterday. I've been having trouble since P left and then I got to talk to him yesterday and just clocked out for the rest of the day! Should be back to normal now!**

_**

* * *

I'm dressed all in blue  
**__**And I'm remembering you  
**__**And the dress you wore  
**__**When you broke my heart**_

It had been a month since they had made their agreement and so far they hadn't mentioned it again. It didn't matter that she now wasn't sure she wanted to make any dates for the rest of the year, but she remembered that they had made the deal on the condition they both tried, which meant at least a few dates. A few nights out with guys.

She'd try, but she thought it would take something amazing to beat her noir hero, and she was more excited about that date in a year than any in between. But tonight she already had her first date. She hadn't planned for it, but Emily had wanted to double date with a pair of brothers, so Penelope had drawn the straw.

She remembered the boys from the night out where they'd met before the last case, they seemed nice enough, they had been flirty and fun, but she hadn't been particularly attracted to either of them. A date was a date though. She hadn't properly told Derek about it, and she was still debating if she should. What if it went well and she decided to go on another date with him.

"You ready for tonight" Came a voice from her doorway. She looked around and laughed at Morgan's smiling face, "big night, the proof you're trying" he continued, passing her a cup.

"I am trying, but this one is for Emily" She smiled at him, wanted to make sure he wasn't hurt by her plans for the night. His big grin told her he wasn't thinking anything of it.

"Just enjoy yourself P" he laughed as she scolded her mouth on the coffee. She shot him a look and groaned as his grin just grew. "I know you'll have a great time" he laughed and started leaving towards her door again, right across the hall was his office, and she knew he'd be in there if she needed to talk to him.

"_So, baby girl, did you have fun?" _Came the first words out of his mouth when she got home and called him. His chipper tone made her wonder if he'd been thinking about her all night

"No. It was terrible. But Prentiss had a good time" she smiled at his chuckle to her response. He seemed far too happy that she had disliked this date.

"_No second date for this one?_" he asked, seeming a little too interested, maybe. No, there was still almost 11 months before their date. She thought back over the awkward young man she'd been sat with most of the night, watching Prentiss and the more confident of the two.

"Absolutely not, I have never been so bored. He made Reid look like a social butterfly" She sighed "Ah well, only 11 more months of this game" She smiled, dropping her dress off, pulling her pyjamas over her head while listening to him.

"_So it's a game?_" he asked, she could hear the smirk in his voice as he said it.

"It's all pretence, isn't it"

"_You still have to try, baby girl_"

"I am trying, Derek. I just don't want to"

"_11 months baby, that's all you have to wait for_" she laughed at the phone, she unsuccessfully stifled a yawn. She looked at the picture on the display as she stifled another yawn

"I'm going to sleep, Hot Stuff, I'll see you in the morning"

"_You better show me that good morning tomorrow princess_" She grinned at his reply and ended the call, sliding into bed with the warm thoughts of her best friend.

_**I'm depressed upstairs  
**__**And I'm remembering where  
**__**And when and how and why  
**__**ou have to go so far**_


	6. Chapter 6

**Lyrics: Come Around - Rhett Miller**

**Haha I have so many unpopular opinions about the last episode, this isn't the place to air them but I thought I'd share that I have them. We're about midway through this story now, I hope you're all still enjoying it. I got to speak to P yesterday for a while. I still miss him so much though.**

_**

* * *

I'm dressed all in white  
**__**And I remember the night  
**__**You came on to me  
**__**And opened up my heart**_

He hadn't had a date in a long while, and that was making him nervous. Mostly because he didn't want to have a date with anyone. His thoughts were all on Penelope. The night she'd last had a date, her third since this had started, he'd laid in bed thinking about her, waiting for the evening phone call to tell him about how her date had gone.

She had made him promise to try as well. Even though every bone in his body was screaming that he didn't want to wait. He didn't want anyone else. But since he'd promised her he thought about this one date. He looked at himself in the mirror, he hadn't dressed up, but wasn't in his usual either. He just looked smart enough for an appropriate first date.

He still wasn't sure how he felt about this. Sure Gabriella was a beautiful lady, and he was sure he'd learn more about her over the course of the date, but as he drove towards Gabriella's his thoughts were on the woman he'd made that pact with. He was sure that this date wouldn't even come close to what he would expect with Garcia.

"You look lovely" he said as she answered the door to him, and he smiled as genuinely as his thoughts would allow him. "You ready to go" He asked and watched as she followed him to the car. As they were driving they started talking about their lives. He always tried to avoid saying what he did on a first date, but he was always asked.

"So, we were there and this girl came over, and Penelope…" he continued with his story after their desserts arrive. He was laughing when Gabriella cut him off, giving him an odd look, one that he couldn't read.

"Who's Penelope" she asked, looking at him with a look that told him he had best not duck the question. He tried to think of the best way to explain his relationship with Penelope, nothing ever readily came to mind, how was he to explain that he loved her.

"My best friend" he settled on. Not meeting her eye, he heard the exasperated sigh that Gabriella let out before she put her spoon down, ignoring the food still on her plate.

"You've told me four stories about her in the" she checked her watch, before looking back up at him "hour and a half we've been in this restaurant" she looked over at him and shook her head "You're totally hung up on this chick. What am I even here for" she started putting things in her purse, he looked on helpless, not sure how to fix this disaster.

"She's my best friend, Gabby" he told her in a defeated tone

"My best friend is Amanda, another woman. Most guys have a guy best friend" she shot back, clearly angry at what she had considered a wasted night.

"There is nothing between me and Penelope" he said once again.

"Derek, think back over all your actions tonight, your stories" she got her coat to leave "Whoever Penelope is, Derek, she's a lucky woman. I'll get a cab" she grabbed her jacket and walked out of the door. He sagged back in his seat and pulled his phone out. Dialling the number of the one girl he knew would be able to make this seem so much better.

_**I was hallow then  
**__**But you filled me in  
**__**Now I'm empty again**_


	7. Chapter 7

**Lyrics: Come Around - Rhett Miller**

**I know, I know. I'm sorry for not updating. My life got crazy hectic and today is mothers day so being whisked off soon for a meal. This is just a cute little P&D chapter. Coming towards the realisation in the next couple of chapters, but I may not update every day this week as I'm on the waiting list for treatment at hospital and I'm not entirely certain when I'll be there. AHHH I know right. Anyway. On with the story.**

* * *

_**No-one else can fix me  
**__**Though sometimes my heart tricks me  
**__**Into thinking someone else will do  
**__**But you're the only one  
**__**You are the only one**_

"_Derek, I thought you were on a date_" came the response, and his words caught in his throat. How could he tell her that she was the reason that he wasn't still on his date. That the girl had figured out that he was crazy for his best friend.

"I was, but it didn't work out. Can I" he paused, losing confidence in what he wanted to say, "erm, can I come round?" he almost whispered so terrified that she'd say she had somebody over, or that she wouldn't want him coming.

"_Of course, always space in my place for my baby boy. I'll clean the sofa off" _He grinned as he slowly walked back to his car. It was always hard for him to continue feeling down when he knew that Penelope was waiting for him. He tried not to think about the disaster that had prompted tonight, and if someone he barely knew could figure out how crazy he was for her, his side of the "trying" to date people was going to be fairly short lived.

And he hoped she didn't find anyone. Because after getting this close to having her, and then being beaten in the home straight. Now he knew she'd agreed he didn't think he'd last another 9 months. He wanted to try and bring the date forward, by at least a couple of months. Only because whenever he thought about her settling with someone his stomach clenched painfully.

He tried to stay calm as he drove to her place, because even with all the possibilities they could have, he knew she still deserved to search for the man she deserved. So he let go of everything that he was feeling, he wanted to try to stick to the original plan, however much it was going to be painful to do.

He climbed the stairs to her apartment, the day wearing on him, he would quite happily just fall asleep on Penelope's sofa. She was stood in the doorway watching him, and he could see in her face that she knew something was wrong.

Getting to the doorway she just wrapped her arms around him. He held her close to him and breathed in her gentle smell. Something that always soothed him. He immediately felt his world settle back around him, and he tried to forget everything that had been said to him tonight.

"Come on handsome, tell me all about it" her soft words encouraging him to tell her the truth. He felt her hand on his back. 3 months and he'd had one date. That had not been worth it. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to tell her what had happened"She wasn't worth it" he gave her a sad smile before leaning his head back on the sofa. "Apparently… Talking about my best friend all the way through didn't help"

"You talked about me" she stumbled over her words, making him smile again,

"Almost all my stories have you in them, so, I talk about you a lot. Too much" he laughed as she playfully slapped his arm, before she settled back besides him. He pulled her into his arms and settled down to watch the film.


	8. Chapter 8

**Lyrics: Meet You There - Busted**

**Sorry for the delays again loves. Still sick. had my nurse here with me today, and I now have my date for the hospital. Hopefully will get a lot of writing done there.**

_**I'm waiting for the perfect time to call you back  
**__**Coz I remember saying don't wanna know the truth can't handle that  
**__**And I tried to just forget you  
**__**But I don't know how, if only I knew**_

* * *

"Baby girl, how's it going" she span round as Derek's voice broke her from her thoughts. She had been asked out for the third time by Darryl. Her first date with him had been a 3 way date with Emily and Ashley, over a month ago. Then they'd had a second date a week ago. He was a nice guy, funny. She enjoyed spending time with him, but she knew that she wasn't going to stay with him. However nice he was, he wasn't Derek, and in the six months since they'd made the deal, she had had plenty of time to think about who she had wanted. If she had her choice, and the courage to bring it up, she'd call off this stupid game tonight,

"Hot stuff, I have the info you wanted" she handed him a sheet of paper with the results on them, when he didn't leave she turned around to actually face him "something else?" she asked, trying not to smile at the earnestness in his face.

"You know that wasn't what I meant" he whispered, dropping into a crouch in front of her, resting his hands on her knees.

"I'm thinking" she sighed, knowing he would get the truth out of her eventually anyway. There was little to no point pretending anything else.

"About what?" he continued to coax the information out of her.

"Darryl, he asked me out again" she whispered, even to herself it was barely audible, she wondered how he ever heard it, or if he just read her lips.

"Are you going to?" He took hold of one of her hands, she couldn't decide now.

"I don't know. Should I?" She asked, wanting his opinion. He had heard a lot about Darryl, mostly from Emily and Ashley, who had taken it upon themselves to tell the entire team about him when Penelope had accepted the second date

"Do you like him?" the simplest question was always the hardest to answer diplomatically, and she had never been able to outright lie to Derek, whenever she'd tried he always saw through her.

"Well, he's alright but" she trailed off, biting her lip. She really didn't want to finish that though.

"P" Derek lifted her chin so she was looking in his eyes,

"He's not you" the words tumbled out of her mouth, she hadn't intended on telling him so bluntly.

"I'm the fall back, not the goal" he replied, with a shocked look on his face, like he couldn't believe she'd said that.

"You were never the fall back" she whispered, turning before she could see his face. She wasn't sure she was ready to face him. This wasn't how she'd envisaged telling him.

"Penelope"

"Maybe I should go with Darryl I mean he's" he stopped her with a kiss. It was unlike anything she'd ever experienced before. There was no pressure in it, just his lips on hers. She was too shocked to do anything, it didn't even register that Derek was kissing her. When her thoughts returned she placed a hand on his chest and lightly pushed away. "D" she left the one syllable hanging in the air. Before she could say anything else he was out of her office. A few seconds later she heard the door to his office slam, and she wondered if she'd made a big mistake.


	9. Chapter 9

**Lyrics: Meet You There - Busted**

**Sorry for the gaps again. I'm having a crazy time, been sick (again) since Sunday, so I'm not in the best place. I can't apologise enough for making you guys all wait though. You are all amazing.**

* * *

_**I'm sorry if I slagged you down I meant no harm  
**__**When I heard the stories said things I didn't mean should have stayed calm  
**__**Sadly you got angry, and it breaks my heart  
**__**You're so mad at me**_

"He's not you" As she whispered those words his heart soared. She wanted him as much as he wanted her, but he hadn't be able to tell her that no girl would ever come before her. Then he'd done something stupid. He'd kissed her. He hadn't planned on it, and the second she pushed away he was gone. She clearly didn't want that. Or maybe she did, and he was the world's biggest idiot for not staying and listening to her. He couldn't face being rejected by Penelope. Any other girl, and other person in his life, it would be different. But Penelope.

She was his life. And if she decided she didn't want him, he wasn't sure if he could survive that. At least not as who he was now. Working the rest of the day, knowing she was in the next office, no doubt thinking about him the same way he was thinking about her. He hoped she was at least. There was only so much he could take before he got up to go to her office, as he opened the door he almost collided with her, Instead he stopped himself in time to just wrap his arms around her.

"D, we need to talk hot stuff" she muttered, before pushing him back into his office, away from the prying eyes in the corridor. As they did he noticed that she was shaking

"P, I'm sorry, about before" he blurted out before she'd even had time to sit down properly. He fell onto the seat next to her, mentally exhausted from his brain working at 100 miles an hour all day.

"Why?" she asked, in her usual soft voice, more probing him than actually expecting an answer

"You obviously didn't" but she cut him off with a tut, while taking a hold of his hands,

"I was shocked, I didn't expect it" she smiled, causing him to smile and feel more comfortable in seconds.

"You still want to wait the last six months don't you?" he still asked, sounding resigned to her answer

"No" she replied, he wasn't sure how to take the tone in her voice,

"Then I'll just let you off the whole thing" he whispered, looking away, before she turned him back to her, and lightly kissed him on the cheek.

"Derek. Stop that brain a-thinking and listen to me for a second" she smiled, he couldn't seem to disconnect his mouth from his brain

"P" he started before she cut him off again.

"Bah, shh. Derek, I don't want to waste another 6 months, when we both know we're not going to find anyone" She took a pause, but he wasn't stupid enough to try to interrupt her thoughts "I have wanted… you… for so long, but I thought you wouldn't want me, so I settled, and that broke down. I'm not settling again when I know you want me too, but I just need the time to get used to the change." She smiled and squeezed his hand, and he felt hopeful for the first time.


	10. Chapter 10

**Lyrics: Meet You There - Busted**

**This is just a sort little chapter. The next one will follow on. Coming more towards the end now but I hope you've enjoyed it! Going to be a few days now until I update this again, because I'm typing this from my hospital bed. It has sucked being stuck in here!**

* * *

_**It's written all over your face  
**__**Such a painful thing to waste  
**__**Tell me now, where do we go  
**__**Now the future's not so clear  
**__**I can't believe we've ended here  
**__**Where's the world that doesn't care  
**__**Maybe I could meet you there**_

It was another two weeks before he saw her again. First she avoided him, and then they were called away to New Hampshire on a case. He'd been so hopeful after their talk, but she had said she needed time to get used to the change. Maybe she wasn't as ready to dive into them being more than friends as quickly as he was, or maybe she was waiting for something official, a question or a time. He wasn't sure, all he knew was that he couldn't wait much longer.

So getting back from the case seemed like the perfect reason for him to finally ask her out, for a celebratory meal at the very least. He was just stepping in to the building as his phone rang with a familiar song. Something light and happy that always reminded him of her.

"Are you back yet" she sounded anxious, but he couldn't imagine why, the case was over and they had two full days off to just relax.

"Hello to you too. Just coming in the building" he smiled as she made a tutting noise, no matter how bad a case had been she could always bring a smile to his face.

"Sorry, hello. There is a surprise in your office"

"For me?"

"No, for Hotch, that's why it's in _your _office"

"I'll be there in a minute baby girl"

"I'm waiting"


	11. Chapter 11

**Lyrics: Forgiven - Skillet**

**So. I ended up being inspired by this song while I was here at the hospital (I'm writing this in my hospital bed at 10:30pm) I hope you enjoy this, and don't blame me for the short chapter last time! This is coming, regrettably, towards the end now. I'm hoping to come back with a couple of one-shots in the next couple of weeks, but I have a current addiction to the Sims.**

* * *

_**Forgive me now cause I have been unfaithful  
**__**Don't ask me why cause I don't know  
**__**So many times I've tried but was unable  
**__**This heart belongs to you alone**_

He rushed to his office, unsure of what Penelope could possibly have done for him. He had had to ask the stupid question of "for me"… he was an idiot. But he couldn't take that back/ He noticed the all his blinds had been pulled, he didn't remember doing that. He quietly opened the door, and on the desk was a big box, a very obviously 'made by Penelope box. Those types of boxes always made his birthday's and Christmas'. Because inside the box would be something so uniquely Penelope.

He gingerly opened the box. He kept them as intact as he possibly could. He reached in the box to pull out a stuffed green hippopotamus teddy, with a note in his mouth. _"turn around"_.

Following the instructions lead him to looking into the eyes of the one woman in the world whom he loved more than anything. She gently reached forward and pulled him towards her. He just let her take the lead. After the last few weeks, he wasn't sure what she would be wanted.

"Derek" she whispered, slowly moving closer to him, he was completely hypnotised by her movements, the constant wringing of her hands, and her unsteady steps. "There are so many things I want to apologise about"

"You've nothing…" He started before a noise in her throat cut him off. He was taking steps backwards towards his desk with every step forward she took.

"You tried to tell me, so long ago, how you really felt" her hand reached out and was placed on his chest as the backs of his knees hit the desk with a gentle thud. "I ignored the sign, and tried to play it off as a friendship thing. But I knew it wasn't."

"Then why did you?" he started, but was cut off again as her hand played with his shirt.

"Derek, shush, please. I wasn't sure of you then, but these last few months… I'm sorry. Just forgive me" she finished, looking down towards the floor. He gently lifted her chin until her eyes met his.

"What do I have to forgive you for?" he probed her, watching every movement her body made as she tried to lower her face again.

"Kevin, and all the stupid guys since" she mumbled, and he felt his face unwillingly spread into a smile. He pulled her tight against him.

"You were trying to find your prince" he comforted, his arms staying wrapped around her as he felt her arms tighten around his back.

"I had him all along, my very own superman"

"I was always yours, beautiful. I just had to wait for you to see it." After that, there was no more need for words

_**Forgive me I'm ashamed I've loved another  
**__**I can't explain cause I don't know  
**__**No one can take your place and there is no other  
**__**Forever yours, and yours alone**_


End file.
